Monthly Archives: July 2012

What should I do to get a Spanking?

BDSM photograph

Spanking (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

While it’s best to be open and honest about your desires, some folks have difficulty finding the right words. So, if you don’t want to ask your partner straight out for a spanking, you can try being ‘naughty’ and then suggesting that you deserve one.

However, if your partner isn’t already a dominant who is used to spanking the ones s/he loves, you’ll most likely be on the receiving end of a mild, almost playful spanking, and not the stining swats you desire. That means that sooner or later you’ll have to find the words, and talk to your partner about your desires.

In many ways, it’s easier to receive the spanking than it is to be the one spanking. When you’re on the receiving end, you don’t have to worry about hurting your partner, and if you’re playing nicely, you’ve established a safe word in advance. So quite often, by being the bottom, you’re really the one in control.

But that’s not always the case – especially when both you and your partner are new to the play; asking for a spanking from an unskilled partner comes with it’s own dangers.

The most important thing to be careful of is pressuring your partner into something s’he’s not ready for. Unless your partner somehow knows your spanking limits in advance, it’s likely that s/he doesn’t know what you want. This can be hard on the both of you, causing you physical pain, and your partner mental anguish.

Patience is the best counsel. Your partner can’t read your mind, and s/he won’t know what kind of pleasure you can receive with the pain of a spanking. Also remember that your partner doesn’t feel the spanking that you’re receiving, so keep your partner informed about what it is you like.

As your partner learns your levels of enjoyment, give him or her time to get used to each new plateau of spanking your bottom. Don’t try to push your partner too fast into whipping your ass; your sudden rush for pain could frighten your partner.

Do your best to react to each pleasurable spanking in a way that demonstrates to your partner how much you enjoy the paddling you just got. That helps your partner learn about what makes you happy, and also rewards the spanker by letting him or her know that aren’t really hurt. That can get the both of your over any case of nerves!

It’s also a good way to help your partner get turned on by spanking you.

The most important thing to remember is that you have to be confident. Don’t be afraid to guide your partner: “That was good. But this time spank me a little a bit harder.” Communication is important in any kind of relationship. But it is especially important in a relationship that includes spanking.

More Books and Stories by Alice Dark

Sometimes, I just need to be Naughty

Let me say it straight: I like to be spanked, and I like to spank others. As a matter of fact, I love to be spanked! But more than the actual spanking, I love the events that lead up to being pinned firmly over an authoritative knee (OTK!) for an enthusiastic paddling!

You can call me a brat all you like, but for me being a naughty girl makes me appreciate the spanking experience so much more than just getting along. It’s wonderful to switch sometimes, and enter the living room clad only in a long t-shirt and undies. That’s how my girlfriend that I’m ready for her to top for the night. I drape myself over her lap and interrupt her line of thought: “Wouldn’t you like to spank me?” There’s a wicked sparkle in my eye, and I move about provactively.

She knows what’s coming next, and in a mock-serious voice, she replies: “You were naughty today…”

I jump up before she can finish the thought and dash through the house, giggling madly as I lead her on a wild chase that results in my capture in the bedroom. There, with pretend protests, I’m firmly pinned over her lovely thighs and my panties are taken down for a fabulous bare-bottomed spanking, indescribably heightened by the adrenaline rush of the chase!

I’m delirious with my relationship, as we can switch as need be. We both love to role play, and that means that either of us can play the cops or scoutmaster, principals or head coaches. I’ve even played the stern aunt, and given the role of domineering next door neighbor to my lover. Playtime is so much more fun with the joy of an understanding partner who helps to to make my fantasies a reality.

The only time when it’s disappointing is when both of us want to bespanking, corset, bdsm the naughty girl. It’s tough then to get the OTK we crave.

Maybe it’s my Catholic upbringing that gives me the urge for a warm bottom. Yeah, I was a Catholic schoolgirl, and the Sister Mary stories are all based on fact. Not everything is true. But there’s enough of what really happened in each tale to remind me of those days and set me to squirming in my seat.

Sometimes, I let my girlfriend pretend to be the sister …

Modesty Ablaze!

Sure, I already have her linked in the sidebar, but this is a site that I need to mention in the blog as well. Modesty Ablaze is a hotbed of fine reading, and a delight (NSFW!) that you should save for you and your partner. Take the time to go through the site slowly. Maybe use one hand to navigate.

Yeah. I just said that. Enjoy yourself!

More Books and Stories by Alice Dark

A Quick Guide to Revealing Your Spanking Interests to Your Partner

English: Spanking, as a part of BSDM sexual ac...

English: Spanking, as a part of BSDM sexual activity/play: “Woman was paddled for her disobedience” Deutsch: Eine Frau wurde für ihren Ungehorsam mit einem Paddle bestraft (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

If spanking is a sexual turn-on for you, it should be treated as any other sexual turn-on in your relationship. In other words, if you find it difficult to discuss oral sex, it’s likely too soon for you to talk about spanking. But if you’re comfortable with your sexuality, then introduce the special feelings you have about spanking into your sex play.

Don’t be nervous your desires. That can put your partner off. You need to be confident to inspire your partner. Fear and trepidation can squick you both.

Remember that playful swats are exchanged in many relationships; what you’re asking about is more of this type of playfulness. Also remember that your play is consensual; no one is forced into something s/he dislikes. Be sure to establish a safe word before you begin this kind of play.

If you’re open and honest about your desires, and if you exude confidence that your play will be safe and sane, you will feel good about asking for spanking play in your lovemaking. After all – you’re exploring your fetishes in an honest and caring relationship. But remember that it’s okay if your partner refuses to engage in spanking play; that’s a danger of asking for a type of sexual expression that’s outside of the norm. While it can hurt to find that you can’t engage in your favorite fantasies with someone you love, it is one of the risks of any relationship and any fantasy.

But if your partner refuses to consider spanking play, try to understand why you got a negative reaction.

Your partner may have been spanked or beaten as a child. Talking about spanking could bring back those memories. If this is the case, make sure your partner realizes that you were talking about playful spankings. Drop the conversation for the time-being, and let your partner think about your relationship – about the trust that you’ve built. Don’t bring up the subject again; leave that to your partner.

It’s also possible that your partner considers spankings as weird or sick sex play. At this point, you’ll be faced with the decision of whether the relationship is worth continuing. Some people are irrational and judgmental about what is considered good sex play. Don’t let that affect you. Partner’s should be willing to explore one another’s sexuality, so long as the play is safe, sane and consensual

As my darling says to me: Feed your Fetish!

From The Caning of Misty Day: A Lesbian Threesome of Spanking and Sex

Caning isn’t something that you should rush into. Build up to the cane. Some OTK with hand, paddle and flogger. Learn to trust your partner before taking on the big stuff. It’s a slow process and delightful process, and worth every minute.

Now, enjoy this excerpt from The Caning of Misty Day: A Lesbian Threesome of Spanking and Sex:

Leaping out of bed, Misty dashed into her bathroom, dropping her lingerie to the

The Caning of Misty Day: A Lesbian Threesome of Spanking and Sex

The Caning of Misty Day: A Lesbian Threesome of Spanking and Sex

floor as she went. Misty rarely wore more than a pair of panties and a short nightie to sleep in and last night had been no different. Before reaching into the stall turn on the shower, Misty stopped and gazed at the bathroom’s mirror to appraise her firm, young body. At 18 years old, she was lovely and knew it. Unlike Heather, Misty sunbathed nude at every opportunity. As a result, her skin was golden, and that served to accentuate the fine, blond hair of Misty’s pubic thatch. That tuft of pubic hair called attention to Misty’s pussy, making it stand out on her golden skin like a peach on a sheet of satin. Misty’s hips were slim, as was her waist. She had full, upright breast with rosy nipples. Heather loved Misty’s nipples, and often spent entire evenings tracing them with her lips and tongue. Above her breasts, Misty neck stretched long and slender, and she had a lovely face with an upturned nose and clear complexion. Like her lover, Misty was a natural blond and her hair hung to her shoulders.

Misty smiled at her reflection, touched her index finger first to her lips, and then placed it on the mirror. “Love you,” she said to herself and then turned to examine her backside. Misty’s butt was one of her best features and she knew it. While the Catholic school uniforms were successful in hiding womanly charms of most of the girls at Our Lady of Grief, Misty’s round ass cheeks were firm and pert enough to put a bulge in the pants of any boy she pressed against. The globes of her ass were perfectly formed and seemed to invite the caresses of others. But for the most part, Misty kept her perfect ass to herself, sharing it only with Heather.

Misty smiled again, and then reached into the shower to turn on the knob. As she did so, Misty murmured to her absent girlfriend, though the latter was still an hour away from visiting: “Whatever it is you have to tell me, Heather, it better be good.” Misty licked her lips. “Because afterward, we’re going to fuck!”

From The Caning of Misty Day: A Lesbian Threesome of Spanking and Sex, available on Kindle

The Caning of Misty Day on iTunes

More Books and Stories by Alice Dark